I was diagnosed with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome in August of 2012. This hindrance of a condition had been the reason for my husband and I not conceiving. It also ended up being the reason for my weight gain, discolored skin on some parts of my body, constant fatigue, and other random gross things. Got to love being a girl!
In January 2013 I was approved for a clinical trial our fertility specialist was working on. It was a clinical trial....DIET....dun dun duuuun. It happened to start in February.... Like the week before Lent commenced. The diet consisted of: no grains, no starches, no sugar, no dairy, no fun, no taste, and no happiness. My husband and I were dreading it. Aaron decided try the diet out with me to show support. After explaining the diet to a few of my friends (and when I say explain, I really mean complain) my friend Melanie called it the "Saint Diet". This had a nice ring to it. So Aaron and I went full force ahead with our new Saint Diet and actually came to love it. It's much similar to Paleo with a few modifications. We underwent the trial for 8 weeks. We both lost 30 lbs. We tried many new recipes and felt great. For the first time EVER, I had a diet that I actually liked, I actually ate, I was never starving, and I was energetic! Aside from the weight lost and energy, I was so happy with the results of my lightening of my skin discoloration and smoothness of my rough patches. These things had given me such insecurities through life. After reading blogs and forums of women with PCOS, it was a bit comforting to know I'm not alone.
I will also tell you aside from the greatness of weight loss and normal
skin, one of the most important outcomes of the Saint Diet was the
closeness that came from me and my husband. We prayed a few novenas
during the 8 weeks, we went to confession often (withdrawals of
carbohydrates can make one crazy) and we prayed together. It was a
beautiful time in our lives and it paved a great way for us to know that
we were in it together. I needed that closeness. Struggling with coming to terms with having this condition left me feeling very alone. After having a breakdown one day about being cursed with this condition and finding out everyone around me was newly pregnant, I found myself in bed for a few days looking through old emails because I had nothing else to do and didn't want to get out of bed. I came across a "Saint of the Day" email from CatholicOnline.com and the saint for that day was "St. Mary Magdalene of Pazzi". After I read about her and her devotion to Our Lord and how she fasted often, I took comfort in this. I too was fasting for something greater. I also took great comfort in her prayer:
Saint Mary Magdalene de Pazzi, pray that we will make a commitment to seek the presence of God in prayer the way you did. Guide us to see the graces God gives us as gifts not rewards and to respond with gratitude and humility, not pride and selfishness. Amen
I needed to hear this. I needed/need to remind myself constantly that God's graces are not rewards. I don't deserve them. He gives them to me because He loves me and He gives them to me on His time, not mine. I have to remind myself that what I do in life is to glorify Him, not to receive rewards. I need to remember that he isn't rewarding others either. I actually have to remind myself of that often. I more times than not find myself thinking "ugh, why is she pregnant?! They don't even go to church!" What is wrong with me?! (Don't answer that!) Anyway, I pray that someone, someday finds comfort in this the way I did. It's gotten me through several of my low moments when the yearning of a child and the cross that comes with it is unbearable; or at least I think it is.
Anyway, between the diet and our spiritual fulfillment, we've really tried to continue to try to stick to the plan as much as possible. We of course have splurges here and there (liiiiike the yummy fondue dinner date we had on Saturday) but you've got to have splurges now and again. I strongly urge women out there with PCOS who are overweight and struggling to lose the weight and/or conceive, watch your diet! Research it! While there's not a cure, there are definitely ways to help reduce these symptoms. I plan on adding yummy recipes as I stated in my last post. And also: pray. I couldn't have gone through all of this without Him. You shouldn't either. Till the next time...
-Laura
Monday, August 26, 2013
Thursday, August 8, 2013
And so my journey began...
I'm no stranger to blogging, however it's been quite a while since
I've actually blogged. My past blogs have been about trivial
things like diet and fashion dos and don'ts on a college campus.
Dumb, I know. Recently, a friend inspired and encouraged me to start blogging. It came at a
perfect time since I've had a lot to say. So here's a little tidbit of me...
My name is Laura I am married a wonderful man named Aaron. We have settled in a small town in West Texas where we attend a quaint Catholic church. I'm the secretary for the Catholic school and he's a mechanic. We've been here for 3 years and have really grown to love our little community. We married in 2010 and immediately set out to do the "Catholic thing": HAVE A TON OF CHILDREN. This didn't quite happened how we had hoped.
August of 2012 after much disappointment and heartache, we started seeing a well-known (high success rate) fertility specialist. She knew all about and respected our Catholic faith. She understood what our dos and don't were with trying to figure out why I couldn't conceive. On my first appointment she diagnosed me with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). This news was devastating. How was I to cure this to have children? I've heard of so many women who couldn't conceive because of this condition! What were we going to do?! She had an answer and gently reminded me that this was a blessing. She reminded me that we at least knew what was causing my infertility and informed me that she had been working on a clinical trial to reduce the PCOS. This trial was one thing I dreaded: DIET.
In February 2013, I was approved for this 8 week clinical trial diet and so I started and came to love it. It's VERY similar to the Paleo style of eating. It turned out that the trial happened to fall during Lent. Coincidence? I think not. This was a saint diet and Our Good Lord was helping me out with this! I had to give up something anyway! Why not all the junky, gross, yummy foods that possibly contributed to this condition that was causing my infertility!? Amen, I'll take it! My sweet, supportive husband did the diet with me and we both lost close to 30 lbs. We're still trying to keep up with it as much as possible. It's now August 2013 and while we have yet to be blessed with a child, we've been blessed in so many other ways. We've grown closer to each other and to Our Lord through this journey by experiencing joy, love, hope, charity, and heartache.
I've started this blog for a few different reasons. 1. As a "pre-baby book" to show our future children how hard we worked to have them and how much it meant for us to have them. 2. To reach out to other women who struggle with infertility and need to hear from someone who knows what they are going through. I'd be happy to just reach out to one person and possibly make a difference. 3. Self-serving Therapy. It's been a roller coaster of emotions and I've needed some sort of outlet for my emotions and thoughts. I'm hoping that when I can't explain just exactly how I'm feeling to my husband, the words will flow from my fingertips and that's all I'll need (this may be more therapeutic for him - he might not have to listen to me on those days when my hormones are all over the place).
I named this blog after a dear friend of mine, Carla, told me that we should start a club called the "Infertile Marthas". For those of you not familiar with Martha...
Jesus Visits Martha and Mary
38 Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village, where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. 39 She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to what he was saying. 40 But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him and asked, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; 42 there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42
I've been known to be a Martha a time or two and so has she, but seriously, just once or twice (please don't confirm this with our husbands). She too struggles with infertility as a result from PCOS and so the name just seemed like a perfect fit. It's been just in the past few months that I've realized and come to terms that I'm a Martha and it's made me realize that I've got some patience to learn and distractions to get rid of.
My goal for myself with this blog is to keep track of the reduction of my PCOS, share recipes of my diet, vent frustrations of infertility (but find the silver lining of my frustrations because no one likes a Negative Nancy), share my moments of hope, and all this while continuing to strengthen my faith in Our Holy Lord. I hope that those of you who stumble across this blog of mine will find yourselves enjoying some of the recipes I post, praying with me for those who struggle with infertility, and really just enjoy reading my posts.
God bless,
Laura
My name is Laura I am married a wonderful man named Aaron. We have settled in a small town in West Texas where we attend a quaint Catholic church. I'm the secretary for the Catholic school and he's a mechanic. We've been here for 3 years and have really grown to love our little community. We married in 2010 and immediately set out to do the "Catholic thing": HAVE A TON OF CHILDREN. This didn't quite happened how we had hoped.
August of 2012 after much disappointment and heartache, we started seeing a well-known (high success rate) fertility specialist. She knew all about and respected our Catholic faith. She understood what our dos and don't were with trying to figure out why I couldn't conceive. On my first appointment she diagnosed me with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). This news was devastating. How was I to cure this to have children? I've heard of so many women who couldn't conceive because of this condition! What were we going to do?! She had an answer and gently reminded me that this was a blessing. She reminded me that we at least knew what was causing my infertility and informed me that she had been working on a clinical trial to reduce the PCOS. This trial was one thing I dreaded: DIET.
In February 2013, I was approved for this 8 week clinical trial diet and so I started and came to love it. It's VERY similar to the Paleo style of eating. It turned out that the trial happened to fall during Lent. Coincidence? I think not. This was a saint diet and Our Good Lord was helping me out with this! I had to give up something anyway! Why not all the junky, gross, yummy foods that possibly contributed to this condition that was causing my infertility!? Amen, I'll take it! My sweet, supportive husband did the diet with me and we both lost close to 30 lbs. We're still trying to keep up with it as much as possible. It's now August 2013 and while we have yet to be blessed with a child, we've been blessed in so many other ways. We've grown closer to each other and to Our Lord through this journey by experiencing joy, love, hope, charity, and heartache.
I've started this blog for a few different reasons. 1. As a "pre-baby book" to show our future children how hard we worked to have them and how much it meant for us to have them. 2. To reach out to other women who struggle with infertility and need to hear from someone who knows what they are going through. I'd be happy to just reach out to one person and possibly make a difference. 3. Self-serving Therapy. It's been a roller coaster of emotions and I've needed some sort of outlet for my emotions and thoughts. I'm hoping that when I can't explain just exactly how I'm feeling to my husband, the words will flow from my fingertips and that's all I'll need (this may be more therapeutic for him - he might not have to listen to me on those days when my hormones are all over the place).
I named this blog after a dear friend of mine, Carla, told me that we should start a club called the "Infertile Marthas". For those of you not familiar with Martha...
Jesus Visits Martha and Mary
38 Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village, where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. 39 She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to what he was saying. 40 But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him and asked, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; 42 there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42
I've been known to be a Martha a time or two and so has she, but seriously, just once or twice (please don't confirm this with our husbands). She too struggles with infertility as a result from PCOS and so the name just seemed like a perfect fit. It's been just in the past few months that I've realized and come to terms that I'm a Martha and it's made me realize that I've got some patience to learn and distractions to get rid of.
My goal for myself with this blog is to keep track of the reduction of my PCOS, share recipes of my diet, vent frustrations of infertility (but find the silver lining of my frustrations because no one likes a Negative Nancy), share my moments of hope, and all this while continuing to strengthen my faith in Our Holy Lord. I hope that those of you who stumble across this blog of mine will find yourselves enjoying some of the recipes I post, praying with me for those who struggle with infertility, and really just enjoy reading my posts.
God bless,
Laura
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